We’ve had Bigs and littles in our house for 14 years. I like to compartmentalize  things. It makes me happy. When Hannah was born, I separated her and big brother Joseph into two categories – Big and little. Now, these divisions are very fluid, meaning the definition changes frequently depending on number of children, activity level, skill sets, etc. At the  time that Hannah joined our family, brother Joseph was only 20 months old. But, he was an old soul. He was a  “worldly” 20 months. He had really lived those 20 months, consequently making him a Big. There were certain things that this classification allowed… picking out your own clothes, drinking from a  sippy cup, and taking trips to story hour at the library – to name a few. Hannah was a little. She had more needs, like, well – EVERYTHING. She was so little that she didn’t even care she was a little, and/or ask (demand, beg) to be a Big.

Fast forward two and a half years, and baby #3 arrived. Hannah is now a full fledged toddler – almost a pre schooler – but she still wasn’t Big. At this point in time, being Big meant going to school (even if it’s pre school at a local church for 3 hours, 3 days a week). Hannah would break through this barrier the following fall once she started in the 3 year old program. They both loved their new baby, but pointed out all of the time how very little she was actually capable of doing. Baby doesn’t go to school, eat with silverware, or even WALK. That always gave them a good laugh. #3 walked at an early age, probably just to spite the Bigs… you showed them, baby girl!

There were obvious benefits to being in each group. Bigs got a few more social opportunities and perhaps a later bedtime. Littles got a bit more time with Mama and perhaps a few random trips to McDonalds to play in the ball pit. But, the grass was always greener, if you can imagine. When it was just the two kiddos, I spoke often of things being FAIR. As we brought a couple more babes home from the hospital, I had to change my tune a bit and instead explain that life was indeed not fair and ” You get what you get and you don’t have a fit.”  This concept worked much better for us as parents of 4 kids ages 7 and under. I explained that because they were different ages and had different abilities – they would have different responsibilities and privileges. The Bigs were expected to behave and help a bit with age appropriate chores, and in exchange they may get a few extras. With age comes more responsibilities (and perks!)

Now that we have four kids that are ALL in school full day and go to religious education every Wednesday night and can spend the night at their friend’s – you’d think that they would ALL be considered Bigs. But no. Again the definition has changed. The Bigs are now the kids that are out of elementary school, almost driving, and can stay home alone. There will always be a distinction. Perhaps they should now be called the Bigs and Biggers. I must consider this option. Regardless, in my mind, they are ALL still littles that hold a BIG place in my  heart.

As Catholics, our family is currently observing the church season of Lent ~ the 40 days before Easter in which we pray, fast and serve. Each year, I attempt to make this season a special one in our house. Ironically, as I once again find myself going to Pinterest for assistance in planning and scheduling this time period, I am slammed with pages of ideas to fill our days and stretch our creative abilities. The point of Lent is to slow down, simplify and reflect. Pinterest was, dare I say it, not the right option this time around.

Many people, myself included, get caught up in the sacrificial aspect of Lent. “What are you giving up? OOOOOH – no candy or pop for Lent – Wow!” It’s a bit like the resolution making part of the New Year that I suck at, also. The sacrifice – or giving something up – is supposed to help us to understand (in a very small, teeny- tiny way) all that JESUS has given up for us. That being said, my lack of Diet Coke intake for 40 days looks a wee bit pathetic. In attempts to make this season more meaningful – I am giving up other things – time wasters, jumping t0 conclusions, and  being so darn hard on myself.  I’m pretty certain that Jesus is glad that I am focusing on how to make myself a better person, so that in the end, I can have a better relationship with HIM.

Also, we are to be putting more of an emphasis on prayer during our daily  life as we progress through Lent. I am a devotional junkie – and love to see how others write their thoughts and stories out in order to teach lessons from the Bible. Better yet, I’m reading more of the actual Bible!  I am in a weekly Bible study that keeps me in the Word every day – and I need that kind of commitment, or else my lazy self will do impressively well for several days, then start to slack off. I am working on having more of a personal relationship with my God,  so learning more about Him and His ways are important. I wouldn’t go to a stranger for help, guidance or love – so I want to have a bond with my Savior for that very reason. Prayer is a conversation with God – anytime, anywhere – and I need more of it in my life.

Finally, alms giving – or service without expecting acknowledgement in any form- is the third focus of Lent. Our family  likes to serve together, helping to clean the church during Lent is actually something my kids look forward to – something about getting to climb ladders to dust high areas and having your own bucket is appealing when you are younger. We can also serve individually; shovel a neighbor’s sidewalk, pay for the car behind you in the drive through, baby sit without charging a fee, make a meal for a single Mom – the possibilities truly are endless. Focus on others – don’t worry as much about yourself – your desires, schedule or what you think you deserve. And, when I say you, I mean me, I’m really just writing this post for myself. But don’t get me wrong – I’m glad you’re here, too.

At the end of the day, Catholic or not, I believe that the 40 days before Easter can be a special time for all of us. Working on humility, serving others and growing in our relationships can never be a bad thing. So, however you choose to spend your days, I pray that your end results are positive! And, if you are giving up candy – or sweets in general – I feel your pain. Stay strong.