Deep breath, we did it. All the bad dreams of the venue closing and showing up in my pajamas did – in fact – NOT come true. The day was truly perfect and a core memory – make that memories – were made. As with all big life events, lessons were learned. Here are some ideas and concepts that I believe should be shared so we can all learn from each other’s experiences. Here goes – in no specific order…

TAKE PICTURES!

If I heard it once I heard it 1000 times “Put your phone down for the day”. Others who have lived through the wedding day of a child advised me not to take pictures during the day. To instead be present and enjoy each moment as it happens. I call BS. Somewhere along the lines, taking pictures got a bad rap. For me, I AM fully in the moment behind the lens, so much that I want it captured forever! I realize the importance of the action or embrace and want a keepsake of the moment. I’m still sad as I realize all of the moments I missed and pictures with people that I don’t have to help me remember this amazing day. I also didn’t wear my watch in order to help me stay in the moment. Although the idea is a good one, I can’t tell you how many times I went to look at my watch and instead saw my beautiful wrist corsage. It was half past a daisy and quarter till a rose all day. So, for the next wedding, which is in three months, as we are blessed for our second daughter to be married in the fall, I will be taking pictures all the live long day with absolutely no regrets!

DON’T CHANGE ANYTHING- Unless it’s crucial, don’t change any plans you have already made on the day before or the day of the big event. These schedules, locations, songs, etc. have been well thought out, and the wedding day is not the day to second-guess anything. Trust your decisions, don’t move the cake table or change the seating arrangements. Relax and know that you have done your best possible planning, now go and enjoy all of the details that will make the day so memorable!

GUESTS – Don’t be surprised when people cancel the day of the wedding or show up without a card or gift. We heard from a few brides that this had happened to them, but we were truly blown away by this one. Letting the host know that you are attending gives them the greenlight to pay for your appetizers, meal, drinks, dessert, and late night snack for the day (money that is not refunded if you decide not to show up). Imagine hosting a meal for 150 people – we’ve all been to the grocery store lately!!! The fact that some people enjoyed a full on celebration of the new bride and groom without even bringing a card Blows. My. Mind. In fact – I can’t write anything more on the topic without getting myself in trouble.

PREPARE A SCHEDULE FOR THE DAY- We had a tentative schedule for the wedding day that was immensely helpful. It included times, but we were not naïve enough to think that certain things would probably take longer than anticipated. We even included a schedule of sorts on the tables for our guests so that they knew what to expect and when to expect it during the hours of the reception. We left out the times of each activity on this schedule because we didn’t want people to be all, “Ooooohhhh- they were supposed to cut the cake seven minutes ago!”. Come on, you know these people! There are so many things to remember and the day flies by at warp speed, so having this schedule and sending it to the bridal party and parents of both the bride and the groom saved the day a few times.

CLEAN UP- Be prepared to tear down, pack up, and transport all of the decor that made your big event so fantastic. Know that you’ll be physically and emotionally exhausted at this point. Have a list of what can be tossed and what must be brought home. Bring containers for these items, and recruit family and friends to stay for a bit and help,if possible. This help is invaluable, and many hands truly make light the work in this situation.

DON’T PLAN ANYTHING FOR THE DAY AFTER THE WEDDING- Trust me on this. You will be looking for the truck that hit you and drug you for a mile. You will be tired, emotional, and in shock – all in a good way. You will need water, a nap, and time to look through the pictures that people are sending you – praise God, because you don’t have any of your own. Take the time to mentally unpack all that happened… reflect. What a day it was! Be proud of your son or daughter! Celebrate, and be grateful for the new life they have with their beloved.