Kelly Jean Lietaert

What are your top 3?

How often do we critique ourselves, or is it just me? Questioning our choices, performances, or motivation is a pretty common phenomenon. We are, I’ve heard, our own worst critic. I try my best to be an encourager – to point out the good in others, to praise when things are done well, to give thanks when I am grateful. But I don’t typically do the same for myself – and you might not, either. After choosing intentional as my word of the year for 2023, I am becoming more aware of my own self talk, and to be honest, I’m kind of a meanie. I often dwell on mistakes or recall situations that could’ve been handled differently. I’m now focusing more on what has gone well, what I’m proud of, and what I’d like to see continue. As I grow in this direction, I saw a writing prompt that looked helpful “Name three personality traits that you are proud of”. Making myself look for positive attributes of my personality was just what I needed – and I assume you need it, too! I hope you will join me and at the very least make a list of personality traits that make you proud. We all need reminders of the great job we are doing as we push through this crazy thing called life!

Creativity

I’d say that being creative has always been a part of my personality and has served me well. As a child, I could play secretary for hours with a pretend phone and a spiral notebook that I had made into my appointment book. I established Kelly’s Deli, complete with an ever changing menu of what the refrigerator held at the time, and took the orders of my family members, serving them their food as they lounged in the living room. I later used these creative juices to write book reports, poems, and eventually three children’s books as an adult. We would enjoy themed dinners when the children were growing up and chocolate parties and heart hunts on Valentine’s Day. As a teacher, I love to create eye catching bulletin boards and art projects that include color, texture, and fun. Life is too short not to celebrate the average Tuesday, or redecorate a room for no other reason than you got a new pillow on sale. Adding joy to the ordinary has helped me to create many memories , and for that I am grateful.

Organized

I have always loved all things that have to do with organization. Gel pens, journals, colored paper clips and calendars make me giddy. Being able to plan, schedule, and make the best use of my time gives me a high like no other. Of course, the opposite is true as well. Life has a crazy way of taking your calendar and lighting it on fire – take the PANDEMIC, for instance. Being a mom of four and a preschool teacher has also taught me the importance of staying on task. Knowing that a tidy space and well thought out day would only benefit my students and family encouraged me even more to hone in on my organizational skills. Understandably, it’s impossible to keep a spotless home or classroom, and it’s also not healthy to dictate an extremely rigid schedule. But having a routine is crucial, and we all thrive when we know what to expect. I am proud of all that I have managed to achieve so far in my life using these skills.

Compassionate

If I had to choose one trait that I am most proud of – it would be that I’m compassionate. It doesn’t take skill or intelligence- but it does take time, and the ability to notice the needs of others. I was brought up to be generous with my time and abilities. We were always encouraged to have open eyes to areas in the house, school, or community that would benefit from our help. Many people don’t offer assistance because they think they couldn’t do “enough”. I’m here to confirm that it’s the little things that mean the most, and are remembered the longest. A text to check in on a friend, a meal dropped off to a family with a sick child, flowers given secretly to someone that needs a smile. I love doing these things for others because I know how much I appreciate similar acts of love (and really, it’s not difficult at all!). No matter what is happening in my own life, I know that I always feel better when I offer my time or services to others.

Okay – now it’s YOUR turn! What are your top 3? Please share – I’ll be waiting to hear from you 🙂

HAPPY FEBRUARY ❤️

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Intentional

Each year, I think long and hard about what my word of the year should be. I was “this close” to repeating my word from 2022 – worthy – something I had never done in my previous eleven years of choosing a word. The word worthy brought me so many lessons, and I was hesitant to move on without it. Nonetheless, I poured over lists of potential words until one made me stop in my tracks – intentional. The dictionary defines intentional as an adjective, meaning “done on purpose; deliberate”. Now, as a TYPE A personality, I feel that most of what I do in life is thought out, planned and on purpose. But was I living an intentional life? It appears I will be finding this out in 2023.

I thrive on a schedule. Having raised four children, I found that our household also did much better when a routine was established and we did our best to stick with it. As a teacher, I’m fully aware that my days are the most productive and successful when they are scheduled and planned in advance, even to the point of over-planning in case an activity took less time than originally planned. Needless to say, most of the areas in my life are already organized, anticipated and planned in advance. So why did the word intentional tug at my heart this year? Since I’m not a fly by the seat of my pants kinda gal, why did I feel the urge to focus on this word in particular? Honestly – it has a bit to do with an upcoming date this winter. That, my friend, will be my 50th birthday (50 😳). I’m not dreading it by any means, but I am becoming more aware of how time has the capacity to pass rather quickly, and if I have things that I’d like to say, or do, or witness – I better start being more intentional.

I spoke earlier about how I feel that I have already tried to be intentional in my parenting and career. There are so many other aspects of my life that deserve a similar amount of intentionality… my hobbies, my eating habits, my relationships, how much sleep I am getting each night – the list could go on and on. Let’s take this little blog for example. Writing brings me joy. It also brings me frustration and guilt when I can’t (don’t) find time for it in my weekly schedule. It gets pushed to the back seat – heck it’s being pulled behind the van on most occasions. I don’t allow this outlet for myself – and I can’t even explain why it’s not justifiable in my own mind. But no more, I will be more intentional this year about writing more – and hopefully adding blogs for you to read about whatever is in my head at the time (God help us all!). I will also allow more time for reading – another true love that gets shoved aside in the chaos of daily living. I know I will find several other areas in my daily life that are begging for more intentionality.

For the most part, I will open my eyes a bit wider, and wait just a moment longer before I respond – making sure that I understand what’s in front of me, before I open my mouth and comment on it. I will plan more lunches and dinners with friends, be more careful with the words that I choose to speak and write, and be more cautious with what I agree to do with the time I have been blessed with on the earth. I will try to acknowledge that everything I do is a choice – and that others are choosing too… and that’s the hard part. I am going to do my absolute best to live on purpose, not just react and respond to what is happening around me. Being intentional sounds right, it sounds necessary. I know that God had a reason to plop that word in my lap. I am hopeful that this year will allow me to grow in whatever areas in my life could afford some improvement. I pray that this year is a great one for all of you ❤️

Worthy – 2022

The past few years have changed many things, including expectations that we all had for our every day lives. Talk was rampant about the “new normal” which I refuse to accept in any way, shape, or form. Control was taken away regarding our school hours, work locations, and shopping options. Weeklong to the familiar, unless we chose to let it go, finally excepting that are all the ways may not have been the best for us. As we begin a new calendar year, I will yet again choose a word to reflect on for the next 12 months. This process has served me well, and I am sharing my word with you in hopes of perhaps spreading some hope in a challenging time for all of us.

A few years ago while in a Bible study, I came upon the scripture Ephesians 4:1, “Live a life worthy of the calling you have received”. This particular this line stopped me in my tracks. How often have I failed to do this? More often than not, I make choices that lead to frustration, guilt and anger. I choose to look away, take the easier path, keep quiet when my voice would’ve helped. I know my choices haven’t all been negative, and that quite often I dive in headfirst with guns blazing in order to make a difference. But living worthy of my calling requires more awareness, deliberate responses, and making the decision to seek the good and promote it even when we question our own future. I am hoping that by focusing on the word worthy, I will take a few more moments before I react, adjusting my attitude and responses accordingly.

The definition of worthy (adjective) is “deserving effort, attention, or respect; good enough , or suitable”. I hope I will be able to feel worthy in the most important areas of my life. Am I feeling valued at home, work, in my friendships and family relationships? How am I choosing what activities, events and organizations deserve my effort and energy? How do I express my feelings if I’m feeling hurt, dismissed, or disrespected? Acknowledging our worth is the first step in taking ownership of our actions and addressing the actions of those around us. Understanding that each and every one of us are deserving and worthy will hopefully change how we interact, and result in less negativity and conflict – something that would benefit all of us!

Focusing on the word worthy won’t change my life. It’s not a magic pill that will fix my attitude or perspective. I’m hoping that it will open my eyes to more positive possibilities. I’m motivated to really think about the ideas, people, and activities that I feel deserve my effort and passion. I want to stop and fully realize the worth I bring to the world and those in my life. The amazing fact is …we are ALL worthy. Every last one of us. What a gift. I don’t know what the future holds, but I will do my best to live worthy this year.

Blessings to you in 2022 ❤️

It’s a 2fer! Valentine’s Day & Ash Wednesday!

I love a good celebration. I think it’s super fun to decorate, find coordinating napkins, bake related food treats, and more. But this year – 2 special days for our family fall on the same calendar date! Wednesday is February 14th, both Valentine’s Day and Ash Wednesday. A 2fer! I am personally thrilled that this day is being shared by two occasions that our family finds so valuable. If you think about it, these two special days have some very similar qualities – the importance of both love and sacrifice.

I know that Valentine’s Day has a bad reputation – often referred to as the “Hallmark Holiday”. There is history of this holiday of which many are unaware. St. Valentine lived in Rome, Italy in the 200’s. He was a Catholic Priest that secretly married Christians and otherwise helped others that were persecuted in other ways. He was arrested and imprisoned for doing these good deeds. He focused on love and helping those that needed assistance. In my mind, I think it’s important EVERY DAY of the year to focus on the good and open our eyes to the needs around us. Why not designate a special day each year to expressing our love and admiration to those who are important to us? Nope, I don’t believe it’s necessary to purchase a diamond or roses, or big boxes of rich, sweet chocolate – but who am I to turn such gifts down? Not a penny needs to be spent – words are free, written word is even better .  Write down your words of admiration, your thoughts of devotion, your gratefulness –  then it can be read over and over, and enjoyed forever. I have always loved the concept of Valentine’s Day and the Saint himself, I even went so far as to choose him as my Saint for my Confirmation! Every year in our house, we have a “Heart Hunt” for the kids – which I started when they were teenies. I place clues in the shape of hearts around the house and they search for the final clue that leads them to a small gift or gift for each of them. It continues to be a tradition that they enjoy each year. We also have tiny mailboxes that we put out in February each year. Many years ago they were decorated by each child and are used to collect notes from all of us. Notes that remind us why we are loved, admired and appreciated. When a new note is placed in the mailbox, the little flag is raised – creating quite a bit of excitement for the mailbox owner! We store the notes in the mailboxes and re-read them every year, laughing at the hand-writing, spelling and sentiments at times (“You are a good big brother and you always help me with my HARD homework” love his 3rd grade sister). We bought these mailboxes at Target in the dollar section years ago- and they carry them every year – it’s been another fun and relationship building traditions for our family.

Regarding Ash Wednesday, for Catholics, this day begins the Season of Lent for us. Lent is the 40 days leading up to Easter, when we celebrate the Resurrection of Jesus. During this 40 day period of time, our family focuses on preparing our hearts, deepening our faith and showing our love. Sacrifice is a part of Lent – giving something up that may take up too much of your time, thus making more room in our schedule to read a devotional, pray or listen to your favorite worship music. Whatever makes you feel closer to God – do it during Lent… and don’t stop at Easter – keep it up! Sacrificing for others requires love. Love is also the focus of Valentine’s Day – BONUS!!! In the end, if you are religious or not, I hope Wednesday is a special reminder for you to appreciate those that are in your life, and who have shaped you into the person you are today. Much love to you, from me❤️

Lean in…

masterpiece

Not everyone will allow themselves to cry in public. I have definitely been known to openly shed a tear or two. I’m not talking about a big ugly cry, but tears on the cheeks, yes. Last week at my Bible study, I cried. It wasn’t something I had planned on doing, and to be honest, it even surprised me a bit. Now that I hopefully have your attention, I’ll explain.

I’m currently in a new season of life. These birdies that I have been raising are trying out their wings and I am nervously biting my nails as I watch them teeter on the edge of the nest. With one a college freshman and one a high school senior, the milestones come daily and it’s all a bit overwhelming. For the most part, I am able to focus on the positive and enjoy this season of new found independence – I’m doing OK (until I’m not).

accept

This particular day at Bible study, I was commenting on a scripture passage that we had recently looked up. It was Ephesians 2:10 – “For we are God’s masterpiece – created in Christ Jesus, to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.” While reading this scripture out loud, the words caught in my throat and I had to pause and pull myself together. You see, I have always wanted to be a Mom. Knowing very little what it would actually involve, the idea of raising littles was a tad magical to me.  I felt that God was in agreement, since He blessed us with 4 stinky butt babes. But now, as my children have grown, I tend to wonder a little bit more about these “good works” that are meant for me. They aren’t so obvious anymore. I’m still busy, yes. Feeling productive, yes. But I am lacking that sense of being needed, feeling necessary – and frankly,  this feeling is not the greatest. What else does God have planned for me? To be clear, my concern is less whether or not He does have plans for me, but will I love these new plans as much as  I loved being a Mama to littles?!

acceptance

I read before, that in order to deal with our pain and uncertainties, we need to lean in. What does leaning in look like? For me, it looks like sorting through boxes of outgrown clothing and pouring over scrapbooks containing pictures of years gone by. It’s sitting attentively as your senior debates between colleges , when all you really want to do is pull her onto your lap and read her a Golden book. It’s repainting bedroom walls from bubble gum pink to sophisticated grey. It’s talking with other parents about how to let go, while holding tight at the same time. And it’s tears – sometimes expected, but often an embarrassing surprise. It’s a big messy box of acceptance wrapped with a sloppy bow of denial on top. Even though we experienced these emotions just last year, we are still novices at this whole “watching your child grow up” gig. 

I don’t think anyone should ever have to explain themselves when they are leaning in. It takes a lot of extra effort and is very important. It looks differently for everyone, but is crucial for all of us. Don’t think you can skip over tough things and hope it won’t catch up with you. It will. I’ve tried to ignore things, it doesn’t end well. 

So what about you? Are you avoiding a tough situation right now? Or are you leaning in? Please know that I’m here – online if nothing else – if you’d also like to lean on me!

 

 

Life lessons I’ve learned from my hair…

I’m pretty sure that most would agree with me on this point – our hair usually doesn’t do what we want it to do. I️ was born with some THICK hair. My mom kept it short when I️ was little, because she just didn’t know what to do with it. I️ don’t blame her now, but I️ sure wanted it long when I️ was little – so much that I️ would put pantyhose on my head and swing it around like it was long hair – if you have never done this, try it, such a good time! But, when I️ did let my hair grow out, the tedious chore of brushing through that mop got old REALLY quick. I️ envied those with braids and buns and piggy tails. Although I️ soon found out that sitting still while my mom coated her hands with “dipity doo” and tried to work some magic was a tad bit like torture for me. Later, in 6th grade, everyone was feathering their hair. Hard as I️ tried, my hair would have nothing to do with it, resulting in a daily battle in front of the mirror.

In addition to being thick, my hair has a ton of volume. For years it was more of a “wave”. Just enough to NOT be straight. Just enough to make me mad. I️ found that using a flat iron worked well to control the beast – so I️ used one daily for years. While on a Spring Break trip with our family, after going into the ocean and letting the wind dry my hair – my children were taken aback. ‘‘You have curly hair?” It was a bit like I️ had just introduced them to a long lost sibling. What a secret to hide from your children! From that point on, no more flat iron… I️ was determined to let my hair be “natural”. At this point in time, to me, my hair looked like I️ had an old perm. Many declared it looked like I️ had created beach waves with a curling wand. Beach waves?! I felt more like I️ had been caught in the Big Kahuna and dragged in the sand a few miles. Yes, the grass is always greener – but I have learned a few lessons  through the years from my crazy hair that I’d like to share with you 🙂

* Less is more ~ With all of the new tools and products out there, it’s easy to get sucked in. Less frizz? Amen! Bouncy waves? I’ll take two! Relaxed curls with no stiffness? SOLD. Yet, I have found, that once you find something that works, stop. Don’t keep looking. Use what you have and let that be enough. You know, don’t re -invent the wheel and all that. What you have is enough. Being content is difficult but awesome!

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* Try new things ~ Sometimes, we need a little something different in our lives. The same ‘ole, same ‘ole just isn’t cutting it anymore. Don’t go all drastic and quit your job or shave your head, or tell your neighbors what you REALLY think (now THAT’S just crazy talk!) Change just a simple thing – and see what happens. Part your hair on a different side, add a braid, air dry if you normally blow dry. Small changes can do wonders for pulling you out of a funk!
* Celebrate small victories  ~ This is a favorite of mine. On special occasions and days that I’d truly love to look good, my hair turns out like a used mop. But, on any random Tuesday , when I had already vowed to stay home all day and do laundry, it’s as cute as can be. What to do? Don’t EVER waste cute hair! Go to the grocery store, go to the bank… BE SEEN – I mean, we really never know when this is going to happen again!

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* Ask for help ~ As with most things in life, if I see something that impresses me, I ask about it! If I see someone that has amazing hair, a beautiful headband,  or a style I admire – I inquire about it! What’s the worst that can happen?! Stick your neck out – being curious and asking questions is a good thing!

* Focus on the good ~ We all know that no matter how hard we try, there is usually something that isn’t “quite” right… the left side is curlier than the right side, the front dried funky, our barrette won’t stop sliding out – whatever! Focus on what is good! If the volume is there, but the style isn’t, grab a headband that matches your outfit and move on. If your hair is especially shiny, but won’t cooperate, slick it back into a pony and hit the road. Work with what you have 🙂

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* This, too, shall pass ~  I’m pretty sure we have all had one of “those” hair cuts. You know the one… the “ I can’t believe I sat in that chair and LET THIS HAPPEN!” one.  The cut that had us threatening to not leave the house for weeks. But guess what? We lived to tell! It grew! It probably took much longer than we’d like, but it did grow out! And we learned a lesson about a hair length that we Never. Want. Again.

In the end, just like life, we have to hope for the best and prepare for the worst with our hair.

Wishing all of you a good hair day – EVERYDAY!

My biggest character flaw…

Everyone is good at something. We all have an area in which we excel. Some are extremely creative, organized or out going. Others are great at hosting, event planning or dealing with financial matters. It’s important to know where your skill sets are, and how they can help you succeed. On the other hand, it’s equally important to know the areas in our lives that need improvement. I am AWFUL at asking for help. Really bad at it. Seriously, I’d rather stick a fork in my eye than admit I need assistance or can’t handle something. Being stubborn only makes this worse, and gets me in more trouble. Every. Time.  I have several examples of situations that should have changed my mind about asking for help from others. But apparently, I’m a slow learner. I need to be repeatedly shown that I’m not capable of “going it alone”, nor should I even try that route. God provides these opportunities for growth frequently because He knows this is my weak spot.

Despite my inability to request help, one of my very favorite things to do is offer help to others. To see a need and fill it. To witness a struggle and make it easier for someone else to bear. The world is chock full of chances to assist others, and I love to jump right in! So – if I find joy in helping others, why do I refuse such help from my friends? Crazy. When I see the question on paper, I feel silly and shake my head. But still, I struggle. To bring a meal, pick up a child from practice, watch a toddler so a sick mama can rest – all of that would be appreciated … but would it be accepted if offered? I know I’m not the only one that tries to do it alone.

Pride. It’s a dirty word. It’s my biggest character flaw. I’m too proud to admit when life is indeed getting the best of me, or when I’m just trying to keep my head above water. There have been times that I didn’t know how I would possibly juggle all that needed to be accomplished. Those that know me, understand this – and help anyways. Their help is given in various ways. A text that contains a funny meme or an instant message that insists I am stronger than I believe.  Sometimes, it’s a meal delivered when I am unable to care for my family. Please note – help with my family and I will NEVER forget your kindness. These gestures mean the world to me, so why do I feel like sharing my burdens with those that love me is selfish? Why can’t I accept their love, smile and hug them and move on? How do I so easily forget the joy it brings me when I help others? The best part of friendship is helping each other through our most difficult days. The sickness of our children, the stress of marriage, the caring for our aging parents, the chaos of our typical Tuesday. We all have areas that we could use help in.

pride

Let’s make a deal. Let’s all be more honest with each other (especially on Fakebook, oops, Facebook).  Let’s try our best to be open about what we encounter that is threatening our sanity . We could even admit when we need an extra set of hands, or one less day of carpool commitment. Less guilt and less perfection. More community and more compassion. I can’t wait to help you out! My guess is that we will all benefit.

BOOK UPDATE – A PLOT TWIST, INDEED

  

I have done my very best to avoid writing this post. My closets have been organized, books have been read, laundry has been done.  I can’t wait any longer – it’s time to share with you what has been weighing so very heavy on my heart. This chapter is one that I sincerely wish could have been avoided. But it has become part of my story, and I must embrace it and find a way to move forward. I appreciate your willingness to walk this crazy road with me. There is no way that I would continue down this path alone. 

If you have been following over the past year, you are aware that I was very excited to announce my second children’s book. The release date was set for February 7th, 2017. Yes, just days away. Instead of excitement for this day, I am now dreading it. This time around, the publishing experience has been drastically different. Miscommunication, confusion, missed dead lines and conflicting information were only part of what made me continually shake my head over the last 6 months. Publishing my first book in 2013/2014 was relatively simple. Other than my “newbie jitters”, I followed the directions given to me and was very pleased with the support that I received. There was absolutely no indication that anything would be different the second time around. I actually thought it may be a bit easier, since I knew the schedule and what was expected from me during the progress. But life has a way of knocking you back when you least expect it. People get greedy and their choices and actions have an enormous impact on others. I am learning HUGE LESSONS in trust and patience and flexibility through all of this – but that doesn’t stop me from being angry and sad. That being said, I absolutely refuse to go through this mess and not come out stronger on the other side.


After all of the delays and malarkey this time around, I discovered that my publishing company has closed as of January 17, 2017. Yes. CLOSED.  The  authors have not even been officially notified as of yet. I found this out after some extensive online research and articles written in a few Oklahoma newspapers. LONG STORY short, they were not paying their bills. They were not paying the salaries of their employees. They were not sending royalty checks to their authors.  They now have lawsuits against them for over 4 million dollars. They have not responded to calls or emails since before Christmas. On the 18th, we (the authors) received an email that the company was in “transition” and we would be contacted within a few weeks with “options concerning the completion of our projects”. There are a million questions still left to be answered.  At this point, I have filed complaints with several agencies and with Discover in attempts to recoup the money paid for the books I ordered – and was charged for – but will never receive. There are discrepancies regarding what rights I have to my own books – I have a copyright on the words, they may own the cover design and illustrations. I need to be given back my completed files in order to find another company to publish for me – which can be a lengthy and tedious process in itself. 

To say that I am overwhelmed doesn’t begin to describe my emotions.  I am sad, angry, embarrassed, frustrated and disgusted that all the effort I have invested in the last 3 years has been swept away. As I await more news, please pray that I can find the time, energy, strength and motivation to continue this process. Back at square one is not at all where I had imagined I’d be at this point. My book is complete – perfect in every way – but I may never have the chance to hold it in my hands. I truly love to write ~ and this will continue. But there is not a lot else that I am sure about at this point. I have about a hundred copies of my first book in my possession,  so I will be able to do a few more book events, but once they are gone – I don’t know. I just don’t know.  I am hoping by the end of February to have some sort of update so I can determine which direction I will take my first steps. I am tired of being disappointed. I have already started talking to other publishing companies. As of now, I am leaning towards self publishing or going with a much smaller publisher ~ once bitten, twice shy.  I know it feels like a break up and you want to bash my “EX” – and please know that they are at the top of my list of least favorite people as well. But please – if you see me,  simply hug me and remind me that the glass is always half full {refillable, in fact!}.  Please pray  for me – this news is a major mountain that I must climb – and I am already exhausted. I am blessed to have an amazing group of supporters that I thank God for every night. I know He has great plans for me. I will do my best to not fear the future – as I know that God is already there. 

Something in the air…

organizingThe month of January typically brings with it a fresh motivation to get my act together. Now, mind you, I try super hard throughout the year to keep my ducks in a row (or at least in a cute chevron pattern) so this shouldn’t come as a complete surprise to most of you. I am inspired by pinterest, home decor shops and the adorable ads on TV that suggest I try the “out with the old, and in with the new” method of starting my New Year. I vow to pull it all together – and keep it that way.

I feel the “urge to purge” my clutter, extra clothes and pantry chaos about twice a year- usually in January and June. The kids finishing school and being home for 3 months motivates me to have the house in order, since I won’t have much time for cleaning while they are all here 24/7. It’s easy enough to understand my desire to tidy up after the six occupants in this house are spoiled rotten at Christmas and our new belongings all need a “place” to call their own. It becomes a necessity to dig out the house and carve out a landing space for all of our new this and thats. Clothes are donated and food is rearranged in order to be able to close the pantry door safely. This year, I was even inclined to give away 14 bottles of red wine that we had accumulated from house guests and such through the years (we just aren’t red wine drinkers). While cleaning out the pantry, I took a picture of the bottles and posted on Facebook that I wanted to give them away to a good home. I quickly became the most popular girl around and also got a chance to see a few friends as they dropped by to pick up their free bottles. Such fun! I now had a bunch of freed up space in my pantry and my friends could bring in the New Year with a glass in the air – CHEERS!

I also try my best to update my calendar and clean out my desk at the start of each year. I make appointments that I have been putting off and send notes and thank yous on cute stationery that makes me happy. I restock my pens, notepads, stamps and envelopes and little things that end up missing like rolls of tape and push pins for the bulletin board. I also throw away all of the old notices, invitations and event reminders that have taken over our family control center. A cleaned off bulletin board makes me a bit less frantic when I walk past it in the morning on my way to pour a cup of coffee. Straightening piles – and better yet, eliminating them all together – allows me to focus more on the important stuff in life.

In the end, your environment is just that – YOURS. If you thrive in a neat knick paradise, my hope for you is that you can achieve your organized dream – and keep it that way.  And, if you like your piles, I hope a neat freak doesn’t mess with them! Enjoy the rest of January 🙂

My word for 2017 ….

For several years now, I choose one word that I attempt to focus on throughout the year.I am not one to make resolutions – mostly because I prefer short term goals over long term goals (I get distracted entirely too easily). Having a word or concept to pay particular attention to for the entire year allows me the chance to look at the various ways and areas that the definition of the word works in my life. For me, it works.

In 2016, I chose the word release. I felt that it was time for me to start letting go. Of what, you may wonder? Of lots of things, starting with clutter – stuffed closets, overflowing drawers, unloved knick knacks and more. Once the physical “stuff” was taken care of, I shifted my priorities to feelings, relationships and expectations that needed to be released. This wasn’t as easy as taking a garbage bag into the closet, but it was even more important. Letting go of these things frees us from the heaviness it creates – a heavy heart has trouble finding happiness. I worked hard on paying attention to the things that were causing me stress and attempted to change the way I dealt with these people, issues or situations. At the end of 2016, when my book was delayed – I needed to release all of my anxiety that was created by this overwhelmingly frustrating event. I was forced to let go of my plans and dreams of selling during the Christmas season and change gears for the future. At first, I wondered if my word would serve me well for 12 whole months. In the end, I could have easily used this word for another entire year – but instead decided to build off of it.

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For 2017, I chose the word acceptance. I figured that since I had devoted a year to cleansing my life from negative habits, people and situations that I could not control, I should follow up with a year of learning how to live with what I can not change – and making the best of it. In June of 2017, my first born is graduating from high school. This is something that consumes my thoughts and much of my energy right now as we fill out college application, cap and gown forms, take senior pictures and plan for his graduation party. In the back of my mind, I fully understand (logically) that he is growing up . I hear his deep voice, see his facial hair and watch him drive away in his car as he heads to work. Yet – I haven’t fully accepted it. I think I am still in denial. I need to focus on how proud I am of him and his accomplishments, instead of how sad I am that he is leaving. Time will help, and so will seeing his excitement about his college days ahead of him. It’s all a matter of accepting it, right?  Being a parent is sort of crappy like that.

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Acceptance is also important in regards to how I manage the areas of my life that just aren’t “my favorite”. I think we all have things and people we absolutely must deal with that we wish we could JUST. NOT. The thought alone makes us cringe, but it doesn’t make the issue or relationship go away. So now what? ACCEPTANCE. To be clear – the definition of acceptance is “the action of consenting to receive or undertake something offered” (according to the online dictionary). No where does it state that I have to LIKE it in order to ACCEPT it….right? My goal is to accept a few of the things that I can not control (like my babies growing up and leaving me) and search for the good – something positive – something that will make me smile and not pull my hair out. We can all use a bit more sunshine and a few less clouds. My wish for you is that you find a word that helps you in more ways than one this year. Please let me know what your word is once you know it – I love to hear how my friends are working to improve their lives!